These long and cold winter nights. A half finished bottle of Malbec sits next to an already emptied one. The sound of the crackling wood of the fireplace, though comforting, needed some complimenting.
He half drunkenly gets up from the warmth of a blanket and walks towards the record collection that he has amassed through his years. Alphabetically ordered, he goes through his treasured list of artists. Adele, Bobby Caldwell, Frank Sinatra, The Cure, Johnny Hartman and The Beatles are just some of the names that caught his eye but none of them offered what he was looking for. Running down the list, he comes across something that he hasn't heard in a long time. It's a great time for Nostalgia.
Upon reaching the letter M, there was an artist that always warmed his heart. Morrissey was one of his most beloved artist. One album in particular, introduced him to a whole new world than what he was used to growing up as a teen. He carefully pulls the album from its spot and gently removes the vinyl, examining the grooves and checking for any defects. Unsurprisingly he finds none as he takes great care of his record collection, keeping the quality of each record in pristine condition, no different than the day he bought it.
Vauxhall & I was his first introduction to Morrissey and upon first listen so many years ago, he immediately fell in love and his love would ultimately lead him to discovering The Smiths.
He places the record on the Pro-Ject Debut Carbon 2M-R record player and drops the needle on the first track and through the McIntosh speakers, with a clarity rarely heard, plays Now My Heart Is Full. A fine song to start his emotionally charged musical journey tonight.
Like curator, he picks up the needle and jumps from song to song, skipping the ones that doesn't suit his mood and selecting the ones that do. The More You Ignore Me, The Closer I Get reminds him of the high school crush he had on a particularly obscure girl who also happened to be a fan of Morrissey. He would always hope and dream that whenever she listened to that song, by some chance, she would hear his voice and finally see him. Sadly, nothing came to fruition and his crush remained just that, a simple yet heavy crush. A contradiction if ever there was one.
He moves on to his next curated selection, Used To Be A Sweet Boy which brings back fond memories of growing up as a child. Wondering what happened to him through the years, he yearns for that child like innocence and ignorance again. That would certainly make the world more palatable.
Finally, he gets to the song that speaks best to his feelings. Earlier in the evening, an argument between him and a friend had ensued and things that should never have been said were. As he listens to Hold On To Your Friends, he finds truth within its lyrics and normally he would be the better person to let some stuff slide after everything boils over and be forgiving but not this time. Troubled by the prospect of losing a friend, the one idea that keeps him firm on his decision is that he's done far too much for this person through the years and it seemed to him that this was a one way street type of friendship. People say that it would be wise not to burn your bridges but after thinking it through, he's come to the conclusion that he would never walk through this particular bridge again as he's already headed towards a different direction.
Later in the evening, long after Vauxhall & I had finished its play and a third bottle downed, his phone rings. Looking to see the caller, he finds it to be his former friend. Thinking about picking it up, he smirks as a fleeting memory of a moment involving a group picnic on a lovely Spring day flashes in his mind and he lets the call go to voicemail.